So, like, don't you think it's awkward when you're in the grocery store and you run into one of your teachers that you haven't talked to since you wrote them that completely insincere (but they probably didn't know) apology letter and then said teacher's husband walks up who's also a faculty member sort of and also received the same letter and everyone's acting all nice and happy even though you're thinking "i wonder what they're thinking, i haven't spoken to them in almost two weeks since i gave them those apology letters."
Don't you think that would be awkward. I did.

SHAKUJO
I'm trying to make these staff things for my senior piece that buddhist monks use to use. I'm not sure why. They just look cool. And plus every cool spell caster in Japanimation always has one so they're supposed to enhance your spiritual power or something. I'm mostly just having fun making props and costumes for my dancers. Choreography? That's not really important now is it? Anyway I wanted to make these staffs five feet high but the wood dowels size that I want to use only comes 4 feet high. But my boss is convinced that he's used dowels that were longer than that so I called about 20 lumber, craft and hardware stores yesterday until I was about to cry because everybody was mean and treated me like an idiot for even asking if they had longer dowels and of course none of them did and I don't think anyone does and my boss is probably wrong so I finally got so fed up that they're now just going to be four feet high. Stupid lumber stores. All smelly and shit.

boy trouble
My step-sister Alise is probably going to come stay with me this weekend. Her flight home for Christmas leaves out of Salt Lake and she's in Rexburg, Idaho. I don't know why she's flying out of Salt Lake, I'm sure that was my dad's doing, I would just say screw it. So she called me up the other day and asked if she could stay with me because her only other option would be her biological dad and he's crazy (I've met him. I had to have dinner with him and my step-family, including his ex-wife and my dad, her new husband. God that sucked. Not only was there so much tension but I constantly wanted to smack him because he kept making subtle knocks at my dad. Of course Dad just kind of ignored them but also said things to make the other guy realize he was always in the wrong which my dad is great at, he does it to everyone). So she's going to stay with me for a couple of days. She'll probably want to go to church on Sunday but I'll be damned (hmm) if I'll go with her. Unfortunately I do know where the nearest church is to my house but I have no idea what time it starts nor do I know how to find out. So she's on her own. I think it's probably a good thing she's staying with me for a while because when she called the other day we talked for like a half hour which is a long time for me. She mostly complained about her dating troubles. Not that she's having trouble dating but that her mom is driving her crazy with overbearing concern. When Alise and I finished talking she just sighed and thanked me for letting her get so much off her chest. Her sister and her mom have been criticizing her so much and she just feels like she can't turn to anyone because they're the people she usually turns to. So when she's here I'll have about two days to straighten her out.
so damn cute
I woke these past two nights to a little surprise. I was sort of curled up in bed facing the wall and opened my eyes around six a.m. And my little kitten was sleeping right next to my chest. She was all stretched out on her back, just laying there. I wanted to puke she's so cute.